A Friend from England by Anita Brookner

Author:Anita Brookner [Brookner, Anita]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-0-307-82633-6
Publisher: Knopf Doubleday Publishing Group
Published: 2012-07-31T16:00:00+00:00

SEVEN

MY first thought was that Dorrie must never know. The others, presumably, already did. Heather had found out, in her incurious way, and no doubt the secret was contained somewhere in that glacial bedroom; I had visions of Michael preparing for his nights out in the north light of those large windows, the pitiless and undifferentiated glare almost encouraging him to add colour to the scene. Heather would have told her father, no doubt trusting him to solve the problem, untie the knot, abolish the so inconvenient husband, who might or might not be a fraud. How did I know? I had never come across this little idiosyncrasy before. The Colonel had of course always known; hence the anxiety that was so striking a feature of his parental attitudes. His pre-marital behaviour now struck me as desperate, his relaxation at the wedding, and his sporting proposals made when Michael and Heather were away, as obscene. But Dorrie had no notion, I was quite sure. Dorrie still thought of her daughter as happily married, ‘adjusting’ to her new status, and perhaps a little ‘tired’ on account of it. Eccentricities of this sort could never figure in Dorrie’s view of the world, where all was truly for the best, and patience was rewarded, and everything came to those who waited, and, naturally, the best was always worth waiting for. And so Dorrie must be protected, from her own incomprehension, as much as from anything else. I would say nothing, to any of them. The burden of this secret must be borne by each of us in isolation.

I left the wine bar without waiting for Robin: I would talk to him next day at the shop. I felt humbled and embarrassed as if the revelation affected me personally. Out in the safety of the street I blushed when I remembered Michael’s childish hilarity. It was the inconsequence of his behaviour that offended me: he had not appeared to mind that I had unmasked him but had gone on smiling and winking with as much fervour as if we were the best of friends. I began to wonder if he were in fact mad, or whether this were some super-refinement of the travel business, an attempt to persuade others of the beneficent results of living in the sun. Whatever the explanation he would have to go. I could see that. Even if Heather armed herself with the roughest of good humour, she could not be expected to tolerate a farce of this kind. There was something peculiarly menacing in the way the marriage had been engineered, as if the victim, in this case Heather, had been of no importance whatsoever; all that had mattered had been to provide a cover for this incorrigible child, so that he might enjoy his little games under the cloak of respectability. I wondered if I had missed any signs, if any of us had. But looking back, all I could see was that dreadful eagerness. And Dorrie had been as eager as the Colonel: I saw that now.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.